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My Local Newspaper has done it again . . .

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My Local Newspaper has done it again . . .

Postby AdoAnnie » Mon Jul 24, 2006 1:02 pm

If you notice my signature quote and its interesting turn of a phrase, it is a direct quote from my local newspaper. Yesterday they did it again, turned a reasonable phrase into something quite silly.

Quote, "Police chased a white pickup for 90 minutes Friday through highways, including Highway 288 in Pearland, rural roads and a golf course until the driver turned into a creek . . ."

I laughed till I had to wipe tears out of my eyes. I suppose if the driver became a small body of flowing water then he would be difficult to catch or arrest. :roll: :wink:
The neighbors said that they knew the man who'd been shot for years.
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Postby skinem » Mon Jul 24, 2006 1:15 pm

We must read the same paper! :)
Our local paper is a weekly and they need some "edittorial" help...
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Postby Bailey » Mon Jul 24, 2006 1:23 pm

I think I really should start getting our daily page, I'm sure our small town paper has many such turns-of-phrase.

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Postby gailr » Mon Jul 24, 2006 6:24 pm

Nice one, Annie!

Does your community have a police chaplain who could help turn him back?
-gailr
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Postby AdoAnnie » Mon Jul 24, 2006 6:42 pm

OMG! What a great idea!

The kids were playing D&D last night and turned a cleric into a double hit weapon to take out the evil mage. The cleric had been hit with a debilitating spell by the mage and could barely move out of the way of the next hit so my daughter, who has this razor sharp wit says, 'Why don't we just throw the cleric at the mage?' Everyone at the table stopped still, looked at each other, busted out laughing and then began working out the logistics. The paladin, whose turn it was next, drank a potion of true strike while the cleric mumbled his divine spell of 'flame on.' The living room was a riot with laughter, suggestions, rolling for percentage and near falling on the floor hysterics. The evil mage never knew what hit him. The paladin rolled a natural twenty to crit and an 18 to confirm, once again causing squeals and gibberish glee around the table.

If a paladin can turn a cleric into a double strike weapon of opportunity I would guess that a chaplain could turn a creek into a stupid criminal. I just wonder what he would have to roll for that.
The neighbors said that they knew the man who'd been shot for years.
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Postby Stargzer » Mon Jul 24, 2006 10:24 pm

I think I'll resist the magician joke here . . .
Regards//Larry

"To preserve liberty, it is essential that the whole body of the people always possess arms, and be taught alike, especially when young, how to use them."
-- Attributed to Richard Henry Lee
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Postby skinem » Tue Jul 25, 2006 1:43 pm

Oh, don't! Give in to the dark side...
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Postby Perry » Tue Jul 25, 2006 1:48 pm

until the driver turned into a creek . .


Well he couldn't just turn into a river. One has to start off small, and work one's way up.
"Time is nature's way of keeping everything from happening all at once. Lately it hasn't been working."
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Postby Palewriter » Tue Jul 25, 2006 2:12 pm

Perry wrote:
until the driver turned into a creek . .


Well he couldn't just turn into a river. One has to start off small, and work one's way up.


Perhaps he did it for the rill of it all.

-- PW
"Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention to arrive safely in a pretty and well-preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming: Wow!!! What a ride!"
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Postby skinem » Tue Jul 25, 2006 2:23 pm

Perry wrote:Well he couldn't just turn into a river. One has to start off small, and work one's way up.


No, you wouldn't want to do that rapidly at all.
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Postby gailr » Wed Jul 26, 2006 12:58 am

Don't tell me y'all are going to spring a flood of dam puns on this thread, too...

-gailr
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Postby Perry » Wed Jul 26, 2006 8:31 am

Just a trickle. We wouldn't want to babble, like some bodies of water. You woudln't brook that. 8)
"Time is nature's way of keeping everything from happening all at once. Lately it hasn't been working."
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Postby skinem » Wed Jul 26, 2006 10:02 am

gailr wrote:Don't tell me y'all are going to spring a flood of dam puns on this thread, too...

-gailr


You can bank on it!
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Postby Bailey » Wed Jul 26, 2006 10:31 am

I don't know what kind of a crik we're streaming up, but watercourse it's goin' to happen again.

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Postby AdoAnnie » Wed Jul 26, 2006 10:46 am

Bailey wrote:A backward poet writes inverse


I actually had to look at that for a few seconds before my brain went into thinking mode. It must be waterlogged. :wink:
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