Got this from a friend via e-mail. Diclaimer: I have NO idea whether it is true or accurate and no warranty is hereby offered nor implied.
Here is the Washington Post's Mensa Invitational which once again asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new definition.
Here are the 2005 winners:
1. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period of time.
2. Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an, um, idiot.
3. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realise it was your money to start with.
4. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.
5. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.
6. Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting "lucky".
7. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high
8. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.
9. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.
10. Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.
11. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease.
12. Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a serious bummer.
13. Decafalon (n.): The gruelling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you
14. Glibido: All talk and no action.
15. Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.
16. Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked through a spider web.
17. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito, that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.
18. Caterpallor (n.): The colour you turn after finding half a worm in the fruit you're eating.
Mensa Invitational
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- Lexiterian
- Posts: 291
- Joined: Sat Apr 09, 2005 11:59 pm
Re: Mensa Invitational
Genius.15. Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.
-- PW
"Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention to arrive safely in a pretty and well-preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming: Wow!!! What a ride!"
Billosophy: any personal belief about how to live or how to deal with a situation when the waiter has set the bill on the restaurant table; and you have no intention of picking up the tab.
Mollicules: little phrases we collect to dispense as needed to calm those around us.
Mollicules: little phrases we collect to dispense as needed to calm those around us.
"Time is nature's way of keeping everything from happening all at once. Lately it hasn't been working."
Anonymous
Anonymous
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- Great Grand Panjandrum
- Posts: 2578
- Joined: Tue Feb 15, 2005 3:56 pm
- Location: Crownsville, MD
Re: Mensa Invitational
Like the old joke:. . .
18. Caterpallor (n.): The colour you turn after finding half a worm in the fruit you're eating.
Q: What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm?
A: Biting into an apple and finding half a worm!
Regards//Larry
"To preserve liberty, it is essential that the whole body of the people always possess arms, and be taught alike, especially when young, how to use them."
-- Attributed to Richard Henry Lee
"To preserve liberty, it is essential that the whole body of the people always possess arms, and be taught alike, especially when young, how to use them."
-- Attributed to Richard Henry Lee
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