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Perry
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Postby Perry » Sun Oct 15, 2006 10:21 pm

Maybe a play on Tennessee and hamhocks?
"Time is nature's way of keeping everything from happening all at once. Lately it hasn't been working."
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Stargzer
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Postby Stargzer » Mon Oct 16, 2006 1:44 am

I got the hamhocks, although if the hen had pawned them rather than sold them then they'd really be ham hocks.

I still can't figure it, unless Hen Hussy Ham Hawks is a play on the old song Tennessee Birdwalk, in which case this is a reeeeaaaaaaaaallllllll stretch.

I'll have to post the 10 puns Agoraphile sent me recently.
Regards//Larry

"To preserve liberty, it is essential that the whole body of the people always possess arms, and be taught alike, especially when young, how to use them."
-- Attributed to Richard Henry Lee

Bailey
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Postby Bailey » Mon Oct 16, 2006 11:16 am

you've never heard of venders hawking their wares?

this post got deleted last time, is it offensive?

mark just-hawking-er... Bailey

Today is the first day of the rest of your life, Make the most of it...
kb









William
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Postby William » Sat Oct 21, 2006 12:08 pm

When traveling from Arizona to visit relatives in Utah and Idaho we have two routes to choose from, the Lake Mead crossing or the Lake Powell crossing. My wife prefers Lake Powell, but I prefer the Lake Mead route, because, as everyone should know, Lake Mead is a dam site better than Lake Powell.

William

Perry
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Postby Perry » Sun Oct 22, 2006 9:39 pm

A young middle manager gave his first major presentation to senior management. His slides were slick, and his commentary was well polished. But then things got rough.

The CEO started to ask a number of questions that the young middle manager wasn't prepared for. (He had been so busy just getting his presentation together.) Well he hauled up his slacks and tried to answer as best he could. But he realised that most of his answers consisted of very broad generalizations.

Finally the meeting was over, and to his great surprise the young middle manager was complemented for doing a great job. After the meeting he confided to an older colleague that he was certain that he was about to be tossed out on his ear for incompetence, not complemented for his performance.

The older colleague laughed and assured him that he never had a thing to worry about. What happens in vagueness stays in vagueness.
"Time is nature's way of keeping everything from happening all at once. Lately it hasn't been working."
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gailr
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Postby gailr » Mon Oct 23, 2006 1:24 am

Well, we had our first metro snows of the season this past week, which always makes for interesting driving. I was traveling north on I-25, the windows were icing over, and my wiper blades were not up to the job. Concerned about the glacier forming on the windshield, I suddenly had a great idea. I exited by an undeveloped field and searched until I located two lethargic, hibernating rattlesnakes. I straightened them out and installed them on my blades, where they worked just fine. What? You've never heard of wind-chilled vipers??

-gailr

still regretting the loss of those rubber snakes in South Dakota...

Bailey
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Postby Bailey » Mon Oct 23, 2006 10:32 am

Groooaaaan.

mark a-true-pun-makes-you-groan Bailey

Today is the first day of the rest of your life, Make the most of it...
kb









azhdragon
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Postby azhdragon » Mon Oct 23, 2006 8:44 pm

Groooaaaan.

mark a-true-pun-makes-you-groan Bailey
my youngest once wisely remarked that puns are jokes for grown-ups, cos they make you groan.

mind you, he was only about 4 at the time :-)


Azh
a pun a day keeps EVERYONE away
Cogito ergo ... quid sequitur?

Perry
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Postby Perry » Mon Oct 23, 2006 10:27 pm

a pun a day keeps EVERYONE away
Not us! No sir, no way!
"Time is nature's way of keeping everything from happening all at once. Lately it hasn't been working."
Anonymous

Bailey
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Postby Bailey » Mon Oct 23, 2006 11:17 pm

And yet, and yet, this place is dead sometimes, heavy sigh,

mark we-need-more-puns-we-need-more-puns-we-need-more-puns Bailey

Today is the first day of the rest of your life, Make the most of it...
kb









azhdragon
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Postby azhdragon » Tue Oct 24, 2006 12:02 am

And yet, and yet, this place is dead sometimes, heavy sigh,

mark we-need-more-puns-we-need-more-puns-we-need-more-puns Bailey
I was just talking to a friend on IRC ...

*azh warms tan's toesies ...
<Tan> yay
*azh mixes tan's toes up, and then thinks 'I hope tan's not a rabbit'
<Tan> not the last time I checked
> tan: good thing. if you were a rabbit, you'd prolly die from mixin' ya toesies.

(and yes, that's about the awful level of most of my puns)

Azh
Cogito ergo ... quid sequitur?

Bailey
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Postby Bailey » Tue Oct 24, 2006 10:31 am


mark we-need-more-puns-we-need-more-puns-we-need-more-puns Bailey
tan: good thing. if you were a rabbit, you'd prolly die from mixin' ya toesies.
then again maybe not.

mark mystified Bailey

Today is the first day of the rest of your life, Make the most of it...
kb









azhdragon
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Postby azhdragon » Tue Oct 24, 2006 7:02 pm

tan: good thing. if you were a rabbit, you'd prolly die from mixin' ya toesies.
then again maybe not.

mark mystified Bailey
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Myxomatosis
perhaps that might de-mystify you.

Azh
[/url]
Cogito ergo ... quid sequitur?

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gailr
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Postby gailr » Tue Oct 24, 2006 11:17 pm

You can tell the natives here by the Starbuck's cup permanently attached to the hand not holding the cell phone...

A man walks into a coffee shop for a venti. When he tries to drink, he discovers it contains a pair of Dockers. He complains to the counter staff, but gets nowhere. So he calls the manager.

"But it's exactly what you asked for," the manager says.

"How can this possibly be what I ordered?"

"It's a cup o' chinos."

-gailr
who has not yet accepted coffee as her personal savor...

Bailey
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Postby Bailey » Tue Oct 24, 2006 11:35 pm

Since giving up both the Northwest and caffeine [and incidentally, Animal Planet-Azh] I had to look up venti, sounds tasty, but nothing on the frappuccinos that I can toss down like water, a whole 4-pak. But then spend the rest of the day in extremis jitteration.

mark can't-take-caffeine-anymore Bailey
And good pun Gailr.

Today is the first day of the rest of your life, Make the most of it...
kb










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