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Pun Times at the Alpha Agora

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Pun Times at the Alpha Agora

Postby Stargzer » Fri Sep 23, 2005 1:44 pm

There's no forum devoted to humor, which I think is an integral part of language and culture.

One of my favorite comics is Mother Goose and Grim. Last Monday started a series about (not ablaut) a cell phone. Grim is the yellow dog; Mother Goose does not appear in this series. I ran across this cartoon and almost immediately thought of my affray discussion with Henri and the list of quotes about puns. You'll have to go to the site and click on Comics to browse the other ones in the series.

PU
Regards//Larry

"To preserve liberty, it is essential that the whole body of the people always possess arms, and be taught alike, especially when young, how to use them."
-- Attributed to Richard Henry Lee
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Postby Stargzer » Tue Sep 27, 2005 11:06 am

In honor of today's GWOTD, a little gallows humor received from Agoraphile:

The Mayor of New Orleans has denied rumors that Mardi Gras is cancelled.
He expects a record number of floats this year on Main St!


:twisted:
Regards//Larry

"To preserve liberty, it is essential that the whole body of the people always possess arms, and be taught alike, especially when young, how to use them."
-- Attributed to Richard Henry Lee
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Postby tcward » Tue Sep 27, 2005 5:27 pm

That one stunk, Larry. We'll have to "levee" a fine.

-Tim
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Re: Pun Times at the Alpha Agora

Postby mbx_pdx » Fri Sep 30, 2005 8:24 pm

Stargzer wrote:Mother Goose does not appear in this series.


Looks like Mother Goose to me!

Gandhi was not very well off. He couldn't afford shoes, so he walked everywhere in his bare feet. He couldn't eat much, either, and what he could find cursed him with perpetual bad breath. I guess you could call him a "super-callused-fragile-mystic-vexed-with-halitosis."

I shall go hide now.
"We are a way for the Cosmos to know itself."
-Carl Sagan

First they ignore you...
Then they laugh at you...
Then they fight you...
Then you win!
-Gandhi
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Postby Stargzer » Sat Oct 01, 2005 4:30 pm

I only meant she didn't appear in the cell phone series!

Being a fan of the late Thor Heyerdahl, I liked the Easter Island one! Thanks!
Regards//Larry

"To preserve liberty, it is essential that the whole body of the people always possess arms, and be taught alike, especially when young, how to use them."
-- Attributed to Richard Henry Lee
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Postby M. Henri Day » Sat Oct 01, 2005 4:33 pm

Stargzer wrote:In honor of today's GWOTD, a little gallows humor received from Agoraphile:


Agoraphile can do better than that ! And if you're in contact with him, Larry, can't you try to convince him to contribute to the Agora ? Though I (almost) always disagree with him, I miss his postings....

Henri
曾记否,到中流击水,浪遏飞舟?
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Postby Stargzer » Thu Oct 06, 2005 1:18 am

I'm on his humor email list, which has some truly funny and some truly bizarre items at times. I don't know where he finds those things. Then again, I don't know where my brother finds some of the things he does, either. :shock:
Regards//Larry

"To preserve liberty, it is essential that the whole body of the people always possess arms, and be taught alike, especially when young, how to use them."
-- Attributed to Richard Henry Lee
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Postby Stargzer » Fri Feb 17, 2006 3:12 pm

This just in from another friend, who claims it's " . . . some material excavated from an archeological dig in the Bronx late last year." I saw a couple that were new to me.

HENNY YOUNGMAN LIVES !!!

1. Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent.

2. A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I'll serve you, but don't start anything."

3. Two peanuts walk into a bar, and one was a-salted.

4. A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

5. A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm and says: "A beer please, and one for the road.

6. Two cannibals are eating a clown. One says to the other: "Does this taste funny to you?"

7... "Doc, I can't stop singing 'The Green, Green Grass of Home.'" "That sounds like Tom Jones Syndrome." "Is it common?" Well, "It's Not Unusual."

8. Two cows are standing next to each other in a field. Daisy says to Dolly, "I was artificially inseminated this morning." "I don't believe you," says Dolly. "It's true, no bull!" exclaims Daisy.

9. An invisible man marries an invisible woman. The kids were nothing to look at either.

10. Deja Moo: The feeling that you've heard this bull before.

11. I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn't find any.

12 A man woke up in a hospital after a serious accident. He shouted, "Doctor, doctor, I can't feel my legs!" The doctor replied, "I know you can't - I've cut off your arms!"

13. I went to a seafood disco last week.....and pulled a mussel.

14. What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh.

15. Two fish swim into a concrete wall. The one turns to the other and says "Dam!"

16. Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a fire in the craft. Unsurprisingly it sank, proving once again that you can't have your kayak and heat it too.

17. A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. "But why," they asked, as they moved off. "Because", he said, "I can't stand chess-nuts boasting in an open foyer."

18. A woman has twins and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named "Ahmal." The other goes to a family in Spain; they name him "Juan." Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself to his birth mother. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wishes she also had a picture of Ahmal. Her husband responds, "They're twins! If you've seen Juan, you've seen Ahmal."

19. Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little which made him rather frail and, with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath. This made him a super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.

20. Then there was the person who sent twenty different puns to others with the hope that at least ten of the puns would make them laugh. No pun in ten did.

Henny said, “Doc, it hurts when I tell these jokes.” “Don’t do that!”
Regards//Larry

"To preserve liberty, it is essential that the whole body of the people always possess arms, and be taught alike, especially when young, how to use them."
-- Attributed to Richard Henry Lee
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Postby Stargzer » Fri Feb 17, 2006 3:38 pm

Speaking of Freedonia, here's a link to memorable quotes from the Marx Brothers' Duck Soup. A very punny dialog!
Regards//Larry

"To preserve liberty, it is essential that the whole body of the people always possess arms, and be taught alike, especially when young, how to use them."
-- Attributed to Richard Henry Lee
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Postby KatyBr » Fri Feb 17, 2006 4:25 pm

I think it needs an ocassional Ba-dum-bum, or maybe you just had to be there.

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Postby KatyBr » Fri Feb 17, 2006 4:48 pm

now This is funny: Image

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Postby anders » Fri Feb 17, 2006 10:30 pm

If I were to mention a favourite cartoon, Mother Goose and Grim would top the list (unless Larson counts).
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Postby gailr » Fri Feb 17, 2006 10:36 pm

Q: How do chemists survive famines?
A: By subsisting on titrations.

Two chemists meet for the first time at a symposium; one is American, one British. The British chemist asks the American, "So what do you do for research?" The American responds, "Oh, I work with arsoles." The Brit responds, "Yes, sometimes my colleagues get on my nerves also."

-gailr
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Postby anders » Sat Feb 18, 2006 10:31 am

For those of you who aren't chemists, it should be pointed out that arsole is a ring molecule. Have a look at it and other molecules!
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