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politics explained by cows

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politics explained by cows

Postby Bailey » Wed Feb 06, 2008 3:52 pm

So you think you've heard this before?
Politics Explained as Cows
SOCIALISM You have two cows. You keep one and give one to your neighbor.

COMMUNISM You have two cows. The government takes them both and provides you with milk.

FASCISM You have two cows. The government takes them and sells you the milk.

BUREAUCRACY You have two cows. The government takes them both, shoots one, milks the other, pays you for the milk, and then pours it down the drain.

CAPITALISM You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull.

CORPORATE You have two cows. You sell one, force the other to produce the milk of four cows, then act surprised when it drops dead.

DEMOCRACY You have two cows. The government taxes you to the point that you must sell them both in order to pay the taxes to support a man in a foreign country who has only one cow which was a gift from your government.

mark more offence- no-one-will-want-to-comment-on Bailey

Today is the first day of the rest of your life, Make the most of it...
kb








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Postby skinem » Wed Feb 06, 2008 4:15 pm

Only one of these will work for any length of time. Only one mentions a bull.
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Postby Bailey » Wed Feb 06, 2008 5:10 pm

but...it's ALL bull.

mb

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cows

Postby ClaireM » Wed Feb 06, 2008 6:00 pm

The bovine explanations are wonderful - I have copied them to show to our Business Studies students. Thank you.
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cows 2

Postby ClaireM » Wed Feb 06, 2008 6:10 pm

and in reply to skinem: in any one location, the prevailing political system does not usually last much longer than the lifetime of the average cow anyway. The bull can have intermittent status and can be brought in by any government whenever a scapegoat (scapebull?) is required to take the blame for government ineptitude, lack of foresight, and genetic engineering............the latter occupies hours of hazy speculative journalism on radio and in the newspapers these day.
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Postby skinem » Thu Feb 07, 2008 4:13 pm

Your explanation sounds like you live in the US rather than the UK... :)
Seems to be how it works here!
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Postby Cacasenno » Fri Feb 08, 2008 1:42 pm

skinem wrote:Your explanation sounds like you live in the US rather than the UK... :)
Seems to be how it works here!




Not to mention HERE!
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Postby Perry » Fri Feb 08, 2008 5:17 pm

I love the corporate explanation. Wait, no I don't...because it is too true.
"Time is nature's way of keeping everything from happening all at once. Lately it hasn't been working."
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Postby gailr » Sat Feb 09, 2008 3:54 pm

CORPORATE You have two cows. You sell one, force the other to produce the milk of four cows, then act surprised when it drops dead.

Actually, "surprised" is not quite the correct word. Hurt, disappointed in the stubbornly poor performance of the lazy cow; then stoically cutting off benefits to the foundling calf before heading out to the golf course, comes closer to the mark.
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Postby Bailey » Sun Feb 10, 2008 6:37 pm

gailr wrote:
act surprised .


Actually, "surprised" is not quite the correct word.


that's because the operative word here is not surprised but acts.

mark no-Oscar-for-it-though Bailey

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Postby Perry » Tue Feb 12, 2008 10:12 am

But Gail is right. The corporate exec won't even feign surprise, being too clueless. Aggravated and disapointed are more the emotions in play.
"Time is nature's way of keeping everything from happening all at once. Lately it hasn't been working."
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