Comments on: Porn in the Slow Lane http://www.alphadictionary.com/blog/?p=461 A Blog about Words and Language(s) from alphaDictionary.com Tue, 16 Apr 2013 09:00:36 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.0.6 By: Badri http://www.alphadictionary.com/blog/?p=461&cpage=1#comment-158253 Badri Fri, 14 May 2010 05:14:17 +0000 http://www.alphadictionary.com/blog/?p=461#comment-158253 I am not sure about your favourite newspaper, but I have seen newspapers in India use such lead sentences to catch the attention of the quick reader. I am not sure about your favourite newspaper, but I have seen newspapers in India use such lead sentences to catch the attention of the quick reader.

]]> By: Brian Johnson http://www.alphadictionary.com/blog/?p=461&cpage=1#comment-157481 Brian Johnson Tue, 04 May 2010 23:46:44 +0000 http://www.alphadictionary.com/blog/?p=461#comment-157481 How about --first choice, but longer “A 57-year-old Lewistown man has been charged with stealing $500 raised by middle school students AND USING THE MONEY to purchase porn videos from an Internet site.” or -- second choice but only one word longer “A 57-year-old Lewistown man has been charged with stealing $500 raised by middle school students AND purchasING porn videos from an Internet site.” I thing "and" and the gerunds make it clear that the man was charged with two actions. How about –first choice, but longer
“A 57-year-old Lewistown man has been charged with stealing $500 raised by middle school students AND USING THE MONEY to purchase porn videos from an Internet site.”
or — second choice but only one word longer
“A 57-year-old Lewistown man has been charged with stealing $500 raised by middle school students AND purchasING porn videos from an Internet site.”

I thing “and” and the gerunds make it clear that the man was charged with two actions.

]]> By: John Norbert http://www.alphadictionary.com/blog/?p=461&cpage=1#comment-157453 John Norbert Tue, 04 May 2010 14:24:04 +0000 http://www.alphadictionary.com/blog/?p=461#comment-157453 I agree 100% with Brn. The new and revised active version makes it sound as though the Lewistown man stole money in order to purchase porn videos -- not in a store, but via the Internet -- from those middle-school students in Beaver Creek. I agree 100% with Brn. The new and revised active version makes it sound as though the Lewistown man stole money in order to purchase porn videos — not in a store, but via the Internet — from those middle-school students in Beaver Creek.

]]> By: Brn http://www.alphadictionary.com/blog/?p=461&cpage=1#comment-157378 Brn Mon, 03 May 2010 20:47:20 +0000 http://www.alphadictionary.com/blog/?p=461#comment-157378 Not only is the "A 57-year-old Lewistown man stole $500 to purchase porn videos on an Internet site from middle school students in Beaver Creek." version clunky, it could also make it seem that the internet site was "from middle school students in Beaver Creek." The passive is definitely the way to go here, or dividing the sentence into two. Not only is the “A 57-year-old Lewistown man stole $500 to purchase porn videos on an Internet site from middle school students in Beaver Creek.” version clunky, it could also make it seem that the internet site was “from middle school students in Beaver Creek.” The passive is definitely the way to go here, or dividing the sentence into two.

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