Heidi. A retard friend of mine's did. A couple munts ago he couldn't get any are after he got into th' bob war. A farner runned him oft the road given 'im a flat tar down to the water tire over yonder. He got thowed out'n th' pickemup and all wrapped up init. Sad. Now, 'is sister's a widow agin. (W...

who can remove my own stitches without so much as a flinch, I've removed stitches it's the staples I let the doctor do. :lol: :lol: :lol: mark doesn't-flinch-anyway Bailey :cry: Me too. And let me tell you, my surgeon removes those staples at quite a clip. I know you won't believe this, but my husb...

Huny -who can remove my own stitches without so much as a flinch, but my palet is a little more discriminating. Now you done gone and piqued [peaked? peeked?] my curiosity, Huny...did you mean your palet [n. 1. (Bot.) Same as Palea. 1. A small chafflike bract enclosing the flower of a grass. 2. The...

I guess I shall retire Deepak's inspiring words for something a little less deep... "Life is a field of opportunities"

oh dear, I do lack y'all's culinary experiences; Thank God! mark not-fonda-gagging Bailey But, this is more like it, I think y'all have been pretty wimpy lately, one little thread from the poo-buts and y'all folded like a ladies fan. Way to go guys! :D Hey, I resemble that remark-Mark. :oops: Huny ...

Ya'llbonics As a public service, I thought I'd help ya'll out: Not to be outdone by Ebonics in California, the Southern Association of Colleges & Schools is requesting billions of federal dollars to teach "Ya'llbonics" in all classrooms south of the Mason-Dixon line. Included here are ...

Ye Gods, this herring stuff is enough to gag a maggot! Maggot: The legless, softbodied larva of any various flies, often found on decaying matter. I would have to deep-six whatever makes PM#2 fart if I ever came across it. I wonder if herring added to the mix would make the gaffe-I mean- gas-passing...

BTW, is the guy who sells frozen custard at the nearby Grove Arcade a custard monger?

I thought a custard monger was someone who had general envy...Oh, that would be Custer, not custard...

There will be no kidnapping around here or I shall shake my finger at the abductor and ask he/she just who do they think they are and then I'll sick Perry on them. Two comments: I hope that it won't be the nearly severed finger. I see that I may have a new job description soon. I have to hand it to...

What a DULL life I seem to lead. :-) -- PW PW, you mean you've never had a half severed finger and had to break into your house? I've actually had a dull life punctuated at long intervals by times of sheer terror. That makes life worth living, yeah! mark several-freak-accidents-plus-an- attempted-k...

Things could have gotten out of hand real fast around here. ) All in a day's work.

was this a pun or just tautology?

mark to-whom-this-question-is-directed-allotime Bailey

Bailey, I knew I could count on you to hand pick my subtle puns! For that, I give you a high five

No, that was just brutal honesty, gaucheness (she did say she was left-handed, I thought :wink: ), or jus' plain ol' cussedness, not Chutzpah. True Chutzpah is murdering your parents and then asking the court for leniency because you are an orphan. :shock: I am both right handed and left handed. I ...

Well, Sam Clam and Larry Lobster were the best of friends, they loved to jam together, Sam played the drums and Larry played the harp. One day there was a terrible earthquake and both friends were killed, Larry Lobster went to heaven but you know Clams are kinda dirty so Sam went to... the other pl...

Priceless: "A weekend in Aleppo...$500; a ride on a one- eyed, farty camel...$2.50 ; 24% APR on this lousy credit card....priceless." -- PW For some reason, this reminds me of some choice words I have for those who butt in on a conversation I may be having with someone: "If I wanted ...

your puns remind me of Sam Clam and Larry lobster. But I'm sure you've all heard it so...
mark the-spot Bailey

Ooh,ooh,Bailey. Tell me,tell me, pleeease. I was absent the day that one was told.

Huny- always-the-last-to-know